Little Johnny Part 1
Most Wanted
Little Johnny’s kindergarden class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted men.
One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person.
“Yes,” said the policeman. “The detectives want him very badly.”
So Little Johnny asked, “Why the fuck didn’t you keep him when you took his picture?”
First Day Of School
It was the first day of school, and the elementary school teacher was establishing the fact that she’d take no nonsense from the kiddies this year. While taking the roll, she was told by one boy “My name is Johnny Fuckhauer”.
So she said “There’ll be none of that kind of thing this year, Johnny; tell me your REAL name!”. The kid said “No, really teacher, it IS Johnny Fuckhauer. You can go across the hall to fourth grade and ask my brother if you don’t believe me!”
Not wanting to be subjected to that kind of thing, the teacher went across the hall and knocked on the fourth grade classroom door. The fourth grade teacher had stepped down the hall to the front office for a moment, so she entered the room and directly asked the class “Do you have a Fuckhauer in here?”
“Hell no!” replied a little kid from the front row, “We don’t even get a cookie break!”
Ice Cream Cone
An elementary school math teacher asked her class one day, “If there are three birds on a wire, and a farmer shot one, how many are left?”
One little boy said two, but little Sally, realizing it was a trick question, said, “None, ’cause everyone knows that if you shoot at birds they all fly away.” The teacher congratulates her on her correct answer.
Little Johnny, however, disagreed. He said, “No, there would be one — the one that the farmer shot.”
The teacher replied, “No, Johnny, you’re wrong, but I like the way you think.”
“OK, teacher, I have a riddle for you,” boasted Johnny. “Let’s say three women are at a bar and they each order a single scoop ice cream cone. The first one eats it by gently licking it around the edges, the second slowly sucks the ice cream off the cone from the top, and the third gobbles the top and then sucks the rest out of the cone. Which one is married?”
After a few seconds of contemplation, the teacher replied, “Well, I think it must be the third, the one that gobbles the top and sucks out the inside.”
Johnny responded, “No, teacher, you’re wrong — it’s the one with the wedding ring. But I like the way you think.”
This entry was posted on Friday, June 20th, 2008 at 11:39 pm and is filed under Jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
